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To love someone who does not love us in the same way is one of the most difficult sufferings to bear.Even having confessed their feelings, certain.e.s continue to suffer for years.Others live this love in silence and do not open their hearts to anyone else.If you are in this situation, here are 7 keys to overcome this suffering and succeed in detaching it.
1 - Question your relation to oneself
Why I love this person so deeply when they don't wear me the same feelings at all?To heal, you must first understand.And it involves questioning his liabilities, his relationship to love and his relationship to oneself.Do I like it because I don't feel kind myself?Do I love him and not him.Is it precisely to overcome this lack?
2 - Position yourself about the commitment
Love necessarily implies a reciprocal commitment between two people.One -way love is also a form of protection.If I love him intensely and not him.She, I also protect myself from the commitment and permanent adaptation that the couple asks.I know I love him and that he.She doesn't like me, but at least he.She will never leave me.As the story will never start, we continue to idealize the other.And we protect ourselves from possible disappointments, because we know very well that the idealization does not last in a couple.
3 - Ask your past
In the case of one -way love, it is not uncommon for a parental figures to be idealized, irreplaceable.We therefore position ourselves in an impossible love so that the.A partner do not suffer from the comparison.Conversely, a failing parental figure can also push to find a perfect person (apparently) that we will like in silence in order to meet all the criteria that we impose.While unconsciously knowing that no one on earth can respond positively to all the criteria that we have set.
Likewise, parents' divorce can also create an emotional deficiency.Thus, we remain in one -way love to avoid reproducing the diagram of separation and suffering that accompanies it.
3 - Think about their couple and sexuality
It can happen that a person already in a relationship falls in love.Euse of another person.A person already married or of the same sex for example.This causes a delicious feeling of transgression, forbidden.To escape the problems encountered by his couple, we lock ourselves in an impossible love which opens a field of phantasmagoria.The idea here is to focus again on your own life and the problems inherent in your couple.
Likewise, if we fall in love.Euse of a person of the same sex while one is a priori heterosexual.the, can be fantasy.What if I really turned out to be in a relationship with a person of the same sex?What if, one day, could I have a crush on a man or a woman?Here, you have to ask yourself the right questions.Does this be fantasy or do I really have an attraction for people of the same sex?
4 - Learn to forgive yourself
Very often, people who live with one -way love tell no one or only a few elected officials.e.s to whom they really trust.Not necessarily by shame, but because they are afraid of being judged.The company is indeed not tender with those.Those who love without return.And this, quite simply, because it shows a part of vulnerability that echoes our own fragility.A person who never jumps the step is necessarily weak or feels unworthy to be loved.E in return.But that the one.The one who never felt.e that throws the first stone...There is nothing wrong with one -way love.Forgive yourself to better overcome it and move on.
5 - Work your self -confidence
By imagining a story that will never take place, we reassure ourselves narcissically.We feed our self -confidence, but in the wrong way.When you want to get out of an impossible love, you should first love yourself.To learn to trust yourself, to be aware.e of its capacities, its assets, but also its limits.The couple is only a cherry on the cake.The cake itself must already be delicious.This new insurance will allow you to detach yourself little by little.
6 - Open up to new meetings
Once the previous step is well committed, it will be very useful to open up to new meetings.Or maybe consider "repairing" your relationship if you are already in a relationship.Even if it is very difficult at first, because we remain attached.he body and soul to this impossible love, the fact of confronting reality will gradually have our wall yield.And who knows, maybe you will meet a person who will make you want to try something else.
7 - Accept to let go of this one -way love
When you have passed all these steps and questioned your deep self, will come the day you feel ready.e to let this impossible love go.Above all, do not try to hold it back.Because it is by learning to overcome the suffering that we get stronger.e and loan.e to love and above all, to be loved.e.
On our side, we give you all our advice to stop apologizing permanently.We are also talking about the famous Wendy syndrome.And finally, we approach the subject of post-Cavid meetings.